Milk Van Man With a Plan?

It was a quiet yet mild spring morning last May in Oxford. Nothing out of the ordinary. Until…a Milk Van sped past stunned onlookers.

Oxford is usually a place of education and recreation. A place to stroll and enjoy the UK springtime. Maybe even sit under a tree and read a book? On this day, however, it was all out madness.

Imagine the scene. The Roads of Oxford had Police sirens blazing and blue lights flashing. Everybody stopped to look what or who they were chasing…

You might be surprised to learn it was a milk van. Going on a “high speed” chase through the winding roads of Oxford City Centre…near the university…and around corners…trying to give the cops the slip.

Was this part of the Winter of Discontent or The Summer of Rage? Was it a white van man behind the wheel of that milk van…and was this another rampage worthy of being on “Van Drivers Gone Wild?”

In actual fact the milk van had been stolen, and it was being used by a joyrider to have a bit of fun and cause some destruction.

Gone are the days of the humble milk float doing a steady 10mph at 2am in the morning.

Say hello to the era of the milk van. A machine capable of doing 50mph when the wind is blowing right and the conditions are dry.

This now makes milk vans prime targets for thieves and joyriders. Some would say boy racers who are in it for the thrills and spills. The kicks and licks.

That is why all milk van owners around this country of ours should get milk van insurance right now. Not just any old insurance either…only the best of the best will do.

Just like the kind of milk van insurance you can find right here at CVI. We compare all of the top van insurance companies for you, and then cherry pick the cheapest quotes and send them directly to your computer, tablet or smartphone.

All you need is 3 minutes of your time. About the time it takes to deliver a few bottles of milk. And then you get all of the cheap milk van insurance prices instantly.

Back to the story and Police in Oxford first saw the van at 12:45am. It “took off” like the wind, one Police officer said into his walkie talkie.

The milk van joyrider then proceeded to drive through the night with no lights, while going down the wrong side of a road and nearly crashing into a taxi.

It eventually came to an end, but according to the joyrider he would have got away from the cops if it had not been “full of milk.”

In the end this wannabe milk van man didn’t really have any kind of plan, and now he doing time at her Majesty’s Pleasure. Hopefully he learns the error of his ways.

Van Drivers FORCED To Buy Dash Cams?

Dash Cams are taking the country by storm this Winter, but do you need one (or two) for your van? Do you even have a choice?

There is no doubt dash cams are a handy gadget to have in your van. Not only do they record everything, which means you have evidence in the event of an accident, but they also help to lower the costs of your van insurance.

“You have a dash cam? Let me take £100 off your van insurance policy,” said the van insurer.

“What’s that…you found us through Cheap Van Insurance? Let us take another £100 off,” they go on to add.

Now, I’m sure you would agree that all van drivers should be FORCED to use Cheap Van Insurance, but should they also be FORCED to buy dash cams? Well, if some van drivers have their way then yes, they will.

New research shows us that 25% of van drivers believe they should become compulsory Not only that, but the research also found out that van drivers, save, on average, 20% on their insurance when they have a dash cam installed.

Combine a dash cam on your windscreen with CVI on your smartphone and you are on to a real winner.

The research also went on to say that 32% of van drivers think that dash cams should come already installed in brand new vans.

Here at CVI we agree. In this day and age there really is not any reason to dismiss dash cams and all of the benefits they offer.

They are simple to install and easy to start recording. Once you are set up then you can forget about them and just focus on your driving and work.

So…white van men, white van women, tradespeople and delivery drivers around the country…here at Cheap Van Insurance we encourage you to rush out and buy dash cams for your van immediately.

Don’t delay another second, because every second spent on the road without one is potentially losing you money.

Once you’ve got the dash cams installed in your van then take 3 minutes to fill in our Cheap Van Insurance form and see how much you could save.

Van drivers from all walks of life and all areas of the country use CVI on a regular basis. It doesn’t matter if you pay thousands for your van insurance in East London or only a few hundred in Southampton, you could potentially save a packet right here at this website.

Unleash The…Robo Delivery Dogs

We recently predicted that your delivery driver job was safe. “Don’t worry about the robots,” we said….but were we wrong?

It wouldn’t be the first time that CVI has been wrong. In fact, we are wrong quite a lot, which has led to some critics to say – “Don’t listen to CVI.”

We don’t care about our critics though. Just like when those critics “criticised” us for offering van drivers the cheapest van insurance in the country.

“It can’t be done,” said the critics

But we trail blazed our way forward, and now, thousands of van drivers enjoy cheap van insurance right here at our famous 3 minute form.

Anyway…back to the story and this is all about robot dogs who are being manufactured right now, as we speak. However, these robot dogs won’t be pets and they won’t be part of the family.

Instead they will be…Robo Delivery Dogs!

Yes you read that right. These robotic dogs are being designed and trained to deliver packages right to your doorstep, and if successful, then you can say goodbye to your delivery driver job.

The Robo Dogs will travel in packs and ride around in self driving vans. Then when a destination is reached, they jump out and deliver the package.

Think this is all pie in the sky? Then think again, because a recent demo in Las Vegas showed us a prototype Robo Dog climbing up stairs, ringing a doorbell, and delivering a parcel.

Pretty impressive, wouldn’t you agree? Yes the future is almost here, but if you ask us you might just want to keep your resignation letter in your pocket for now.

Why? Because although the Robo Delivery Dog technology is certainly moving along nicely…it’s still quite a few years from becoming a reality in every city, town and village of the UK.

In other words, yes, the future is definitely going to be controlled by packs of Robo Dogs while you sign on down the local job centre, but for now, you can breathe a sigh of relief and just get on with your job.

So make the most of it. Enjoy tomorrow morning as you set off in your van and deliver that package to Mr Smith and Mrs Jones.

Take some time on your delivery route to stop and smell the Roses. And even stop to spend 3 minutes on our cheap van insurance form.

You really could save a packet in 3 minutes or less. Give it a try and find out for yourself.

CVI Shining Part 3

Me and the Canteen Manager walked towards the JNR’s office. There was an eerie silence throughout the CVI HQ.

We approached the door, which was halfway open. I pushed it with caution, and it opened up a bit more with a creak.

“JNR?” I said. “JNR…are you there?”

No answer.

The room was dark, with just a bit of sunlight creeping through the curtains…and at the end of the sunlight was the CVI typewriter on the desk.

I began to enter the room. With every footstep I felt like I was being watched.

“I will wait here,” said the canteen manager from outside the room.

As I approached the typewriter I noticed pages and pages of paper in the shadows surrounding the typewriter.

Maybe the JNR went old school and cranked out some blog posts on the typewriter? I thought.

I opened up the curtains and with the bright sunshine now fully lighting the room I picked up the first piece of paper.

This is what I read:

Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy
Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy
Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy
Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy

and on and on it went…

I picked up the second piece of paper and read even more…

Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy. Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy. Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy. Just chips and no sauce makes Jack a dull boy.

And on and on it went. Page after page. The same words written over and over and over and over again.

“I think I know why he was so eager to get in the stationery cupboard,” I said to the canteen manager…”He wanted to get to your homemade tomato sauce….”

“It is very popular,” he replied.

“I think I should give him a couple of days off…once we find him,” I suggested.

10 minutes later and I was sitting in my office and drinking a whiskey. Still trying to piece together everything that had happened, right here at the CVI HQ over the holidays.

Obviously the JNR had gone crazy without any tomato sauce on his chips, to the point where he went mad and got the axe out of the garden shed…before smashing open the stationery cupboard.

And this “shining” thing the canteen manager was talking about…just what is going on here?

I poured myself another whiskey when my eye suddenly caught a glimpse of a picture on my wall that I knew well, only this time…something seemed different.

I moved closer…

The framed picture on my wall was of a party here at CVI HQ in the noughties, where everybody was dressed in the height of fashion.

It was a party with all of the original CVI staff, to celebrate the introduction of our now famous “3 minute form.”

As I looked closer I saw the CNR in the picture. He had only been working at CVI for a few months, he was still a young lad…an apprentice.

As I looked at his face I dropped my whiskey.

The young lad in the picture…was the JNR!

“He’s always been the CNR, has the JNR,” I said to myself.

CVI Shining Part 2

I arrived back at CVI headquarters. It was now 2019, and as the boss of CVI I was determined to make this the year of cheap van insurance.

Immediately I knew something was wrong as I approached the HQ main entrance. The front door was open and all the lights were off.

“JNR,” I shouted as I cautiously entered the building.

“HELLO…JNR…IS ANYBODY THERE…JNR?” I shouted again, only to be met with silence.

I started walking down the hallway when I nearly tripped over a push scooter.

“He’s obviously been having fun,” I said.

And then I saw something which made me stop in my tracks. I just stood there, in shock.

Right there on the floor next to the stationery cupboard was the canteen manger…and a red substance all over the floor. There was also an axe there.

“Canteen Manager,” I shouted as I ran over to him.

He woke up immediately and seem startled to see me.

“What is going on here? Where is the JNR? Why are you here and on the floor?” I asked him.

“I had visions last night,” he replied as he got up off the floor. “I woke up and had a vision of the JNR smashing open the stationery cupboard with an axe.”

“They call it Shining,” he went on to add. “Me and the CNR used to have entire conversations without ever opening our mouths…and just before I left for the holidays, I noticed the JNR could do the same thing. When I woke up last night with those visions, I knew he was in trouble. So I got in my car and rushed here”

“So why are you on the floor?” I asked.

“Well, I got here and found the stationery cupboard smashed open, and as you may remember, this is where I store my homemade tomato sauce. When I saw all of my sauce on the floor, I was in shock and I passed out.”

It was then I noticed something was missing out of the stationary cupboard. The prized possession of CVI…the typewriter.

When I first started CVI back in the day, before the internet, all I had was that typewriter and a dream.

When I first typed those words on the typewriter back in the day – “Save a packet on van insurance in 3 minutes” – I knew I was on to something.

And now it was missing.

“Did you have any visions about what he did with the typewriter?” I asked the canteen manager.

“I think you might want to have a look in his office,” he replied.

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